It's Friday.......... I need a drink!

How can a job that doesn't endanger your life make one so miserable? I promised not to turn my blog into a job-hate rant so I won't go there..... peep this little lyrical lovely for blog-groupies everywhere.

blog to me in a way that I’ll forever want to hold you

caress me with verses that seem to linger in my ear

you penetrate my thoughts with your blogetic presentation

leaving behind mere whispers of a voice I long to hear......

Now that's gangsta!

Before you right-click & copy/paste the above, know that it's COPYRIGHTED.

Seeing as how my work was recently boosted, yes, boosted! As in all-out stolen, thiefed, 5 finger discount, hope nobody saw that 'ish, tooked! Not by a commoner mind you, but a respected well-known member of black religious society. He stole it, he published it, he claimed it but I have the original. I ain't namin names & I ain't trippin since it was my fault I slipped & didn't acquire the rights to my work at the time. But KNOW this, I forgets nothing & it ain't over.... he knows who he is....IT AIN'T OVA!


She's Forever Your Girl!


Too bad nobody gives a damn.

What's the world coming to when Britney Spears can bite the hell out of a cheeseburger & it sells for $500. But Paula Abdul can't sell a date, a shopping spree & a trip to NYC? That's right, noONE bid on Paula's ebay date so the site pulled the listing after 4 days! Now, that's gotta hurt!

As in; Prom date shows up to the prom with someone else cuz he forgot he asked you HURT!

As in; Spending the day at the spa, new hairstyle, new clothes, professional makeup, mani & pedi only to show up @ the party, run into your ex & his new girl has on jeans & a t-shirt that says "Vote For Pedro" & somehow looks 10x better than your azz HURT!

Just sad!

Paula's a hot mess now & we all know it but in 1989, she was the 'ish & I was her biggest fan! Oh shut up... like you don't have someone famous who you're embarrased to say "I used to LOOOOVE them". Paula could dance her butt off & in HEELS at that!!!

Beyonce who!? Let's not forget it was Paula who first donned a pair of pumps & tap-danced, jumped around, & straight got her boogie ON! I loved "Forever Your Girl" but I saw the end coming when she went for album #2 & had a miserable performance (remember Vibeology) at the MTV music awards that left both of us feeling sad, depressed & ashamed. After that, I knew her 15 minutes had officially expired but it didn't matter because it was a hella of 15 minute experience... BTW Janet, Paula will take that "THANK YOU" any time you're ready.

Moment of silence to respect the technique!
Click the link, watch & be impressed....

CELEBRITY RIDDLE:

Q: What do Angelina & Madonna have that Britney supposedly wants???
A: I'll take "African Baby" for 500 Alex.

Ding! Ding! Ding! You are correct!!!

I really hope this news is false. Honestly people, African babies are not handbags, you can't shove them in the back of your closet as soon as they go out of style! If you're a danger to your own kids why screw up the life of a kid that you don't have to buy, oops, I mean adopt.

For some reason, I just see celebs going to third world countries visiting orphanages with their checkbooks out all "I like this one, no wait, wait, that one is soooo awesome!", "Does it come in a 5 or 6 month model cuz a 6 month model would be so perfect for my Vanity Fair photoshoot next month!" "I hear they photograph better".

One thing's for sure, when these kids get older, their going to have one heck of a book deal..


I LOVE BARACK OBAMA!!!


I would love to see him as the next president! Besides really caring about the state of the world, he is very comfortable in his own skin & knows who he is. Plus, he has a REAL family that doesn't just play one on TV. U know what I'm talkin bout. He is genuine & he certainly has my vote whether he runs or not!! No, that was not a typo or grammatical error... WHETHER HE RUNS OR NOT..


A new hotty-hot-hotness has arrived! Thank you Oprah!

(pic doesn't do him justice but it's the only one I can find)

I've been tuning in to the Oprah show every Tuesday to witness the adventures of her road-trip across America with her B-F-F Gayle King. I think Gayle is naturally hilarious by the way..

To meet her fitness goals, Oprah has a road trainer with her courtesy of Bob "boy-am-I-a-lucky-fitness-pro" Greene. The road trainer is Chris Robinson & he seems really easy-going with a great smile & an obvious love of fitness. Gayle's admitted she thinks he's a lovely distraction while O acts like she hardly noticed. Chile puh-leeze. Fine is Fine & HE is FINE! All I can say. Fine.


WHAT A LOVELY SURPRISE..... (personal moment interruption)

So, the other day, I had a rough day at work. Okay, every day is a rough day truth be told but as usual I vented to HIM. As usual, he listened, sympathized, praised my underpaid work achievements & so it went. Then, today at around 1:15pm, I received an e-mail from the front desk. The subject was FLOWERS & I immediately dashed out there to see a beautiful bouquet of roses in a pretty glass vase. HE sent them just because he wanted to brighten my day. What a sweetie! 10 years & he's still full of surprises. Okay, now that I've clearly sickened you, here's a pic of the bouquet & I promise I'll move on...




Before I bid you bonne nuit, I MUST share this:


HILARIOUS QUOTE OF THE DAY:

"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
Colonel Gerald Wellman


Honestly, seemingly intellingent people say some of the dumbest 'ish you'll never hear!!

Okay, till next time

Hump Day Ramblings & Writers Block

The only thing exciting about Wednesday is the fact that it's two days away from Friday bringing us thisclose to the ever exciting weekend, right? Yesterday I spent three steadfast hours glued to my computer researching material for an article that I am anxious to complete. I planned on finishing it tonight but got home late & the second I sat down at my desk, writers block kicked in so what better way to turn it around and wet my writers palette than dishing on the latest this & that!



1st Up: Posh Spice says she's Uggggly naked!
Now, I know you all remember Victoria "Bend it like" Beckham from the upbeat yet unusual pop girl band - The Spice Girls. I was not a fan of the group or unusual songs like "If You Wanna Be My Lover" though they caught my attention with a ballad titled "2 Become 1 ." The song was not vocal mastery but it sounded rather normal considering their previous work so I'd let it play on the radio without turning the station. Now, back to Vicky's ugly nakedness - okay, so she says that childbirth has left her body a little ragged and a lack of a "bum" has left her wishing for a little more bootyliciousness if you know what I mean.

Well, that's often to be expected when one gives birth! Personally, I thought she'd say it's because she's a grown woman who weighs less than a small child (minus the medicine balls injected into her chest... really, can you say "overkill"). I promise to elaborate on this topic in a future post cause I gots LOTS to say about this whole skinny craze nonsense but as for Posh... well, would we even care if weren't for HIM!



2nd Up: Madge wants an African baby!
I heard Madonna was planning a trip to Malawi to possibly adopt a baby there.... I also read that ole' Guy wasn't really feeling the idea. Now, I know they have two children together and apparently two nannies. I remember watching Madonna in a documentary not so long ago, that featured the star with her two children looking a little, um, how do you say... FREEKIN EXHAUSTED! The kids were running everywhere, she looked spent and Guy, well, he was nowhere to be found. Now, you gotta figure having two nannies has got to free up a lotta yoga time for the material girl so when she does spend time with her kids, it should be enjoyable right? Apparently not, cuz D.S.S. looked as though she was going to quickly speed dial her nannies as soon as the cameras stopped rolling... so I ask, WTF with adopting a baby in Africa? Honestly, I think A.J. did it from her heart but if Nikki Finn is just doing this to try to compete or keep up with her..... she'll be in for a rude awakening!



Neeeeexxxt, Grey's Anatomy Brawl??:
I heard there was an altercation on the set of my favorite TV show. . . apparently Patrick Dempsey and Isaiah Washington got into it after Dempsey complained about other actors arriving tardy to the set. It has been reported that Isaiah choked Patrick and a "violent brawl" ensued. Oh no, say it ain't so! If this were reality TV, someone would have to pack their bags, say good-bye to their fellow roomates and head home, followed by a video montage of their best moments in the house set to some emotionally stirring song. (too much Real World, I know)

.. Ok, back to Burke & McDreamy! I love 'em both & considering Grey's Anatomy is so yummy yum yum!, I don't want to see it suffer any bad press or folks 'ego burstin' on the set. Chaundra Rimes is just making a name for herself in this business, don't "hood it up" now, fellas. Act like you been somewhere aaigght! I know what it is, Washington's sweatin that sexy ad campaign Dempsey struck with NY & Co..... it's cool Isaiah, can we get him a deal over-here please!?! Let's see now. . . NY & Co's rival is ummmmm, aha! - The Limited! That's it, just give Washington and Sandra Oh a hot & heavy advertisment for "The Limited" and all is love again.



Site 2 Peek: Have u ever visited the website for Sephora, MAC or Smashbox cosmetics ONLY to purchase a lipgloss and got to browsing around?? After a minute or so, you notice the cost of the mascara you crave or lipstick or latest shade of blush and suddenly you realize you could pay off a small cell bill for the price of one more item. Been there, relate to that!

Well, how exciting would it be to afford the whole darn website for less than $100? Yea, the MAC website for less than $100.... dream on! I found a wonderful little site where you can do just that because I did and it was soooo much fun when that box of goodies arrived, let me tell you! If you love beauty like I love beauty, you'll LOVE this site because every item (except the makeup bags) is just $1, yes, ONE DOLLAR!!!

Click here to watch a video of E.L.F featured on STRIPPED (i love this show)

Eyes. Lips. Face features numerous items from lipsticks to powders to gloss to makeup bags to U NAME IT! The quality's good, shades for all skin types and you can not beat the price. I'm not a blush girl so I skipped that product but I ordered everything else that struck my fancy covering every category and my order came to about $67!

Try it, you'll love it & if you leave with nothing (how could u!), you at least have to try the nail polish remover pads! I kid you not, these things are fantabulous, smell good, are uber moisturizing and 1 pad can handle close to all 10 fingers. Trust - - - you will love!

Oh so much more to say but slumber calls & I must answer in order to make it through yet another dreadful day at my 9-5! Positive, positive thoughts .... I leave you with a lil quote:

"If you cannot get people to listen to you any other way, tell them it's confidential." - Patrick Murray

Chow!

Celebs don't rule this city so check your ego with your luggage!

Beyonce Knowles is no Petite-Patty by any means. As a matter of fact, she's the only female celebrity (besides Kimora) to stand next to Tyra Banks without looking like a dwarf. Standing next to J-Lo, she makes the Latina star look frail in comparison yet somehow her clothing label looks so small the sizes should have an 'A' in front of the number as in "Anorexic 4", "Anorexic 5" and so on.

As I visited the House of Dereon display, I checked out the entire line and quickly realized everything in this line is cut small. I wondered how women built like Beyonce could possibly fit the clothes she designed, so the fact that her recent trip to Chicago ended with a disappointing interview does not surprise me in the least!

CLICK HERE TO WATCH THE INTERVIEW

She had a fashion show at Macy's one day and headlined the fall fashion extravaganza known as Glamorama the next. Considering the reason for her visit was exclusively to promote her clothing line, (House of Dereon) why wasn't she prepared? Why were the merchants complaining about the size of the clothes they received? Why were all the models featured in her runway show so damn small? And why couldn't she handle the questions asked without turning to mommy for help?

If you are going to launch a clothing line, why not design clothes your fans can afford right off the back? Her clothes are so overpriced that she is in the process of creating a less expensive line for regular people like her FANS. That just seems arrogant. Does Beyonce think her career started with high-end couture? She started out singing about Bills, Bills, Bills for goodness sake! People who can afford high-end couture fashion don't fret much over bills Beyonce. She couldn't afford high end clothes herself which is why her mother had to make those hideous outfits for the entire group! But fast-forward 9 years, a few grammy's and millions of record sales later and suddenly she's forgotten who made her the household name she is today.

I find it odd that Baby Phat and J-Lo's lines are much more reasonably priced when both Kimora Lee-Simmons and Jennifer Lopez have a few years on Beyonce and I am sure they have been strutting around in couture fashions longer than Bey has. Or perhaps they are simply better business women, maybe it's both.

Given her celebrity status, I am glad the reporter was not intimidated and went straight for the real questions concerning the local merchants in Chicago. I also think Beyonce should have addressed the questions asked of her. Her mother just made the situation worse by refusing to discuss it! The interview became a spectacle the minute Tina declined to discuss it "on air" and shut the interview down completely. Actions like that speak volumes about the phony image Beyonce portrays and further fuels speculation that she's not all that bright and a manufactured artist.

She spoke very highly of herself while promoting her latest CD "B-Day" so she should be ready and willing to offer up answers like the "STRONG, CONFIDENT, INTELLIGENT" woman she claims to be and certainly acts the part in her videos. But this interview shows that when the going gets tough and the light shining on Bey isn't highlighting her best qualities, she quickly shuts down and turns to Mama Tina to take the reigns.

What kinda woman is that? More like a little girl who obviously has spent too much time being coached on how to be pretty, appear flawless and serve Jay-Z to know what it takes to stand on her own two feet and weather the perils of her success. This may have served her well when she was a kid but "Suga Mama's" 25 now and from her latest CD and interviews, she's "handlin the damn thing" so she needs to get on her bizzness and see to it that she is aware of what's truly going on. If the stores didn't receive correct sizing then she should have made sure her people delivered the sizes they needed. Or is it the sizes don't exist because unlike Europe and California, Chicago is a food town and honey, women here, well, we eat!

Maybe she needs real management instead of mommy and daddy making decisions because the apron strings are obviously in desperate need of being cut. The lady asked her a question about her clothing line and she looked at her mother who was obviously frazzled herself. Celebrity's must know that into every successful career a little rain must fall and either you handle it or it handles you. If you handle it properly, you can bounce back stronger than ever but if it handles you, your entire career will be over in a flash!

I guess Beyonce "must not know bout Chi, she must not know bout Chi"

TGIAF!!

The weekend's almost here (Hallelu!) so why not post something laid back, fun & just because right!?!


Favorite things!

Words: Fantabulous (mine), Neo-Urban (mine), Tres, Upscale, Edgy, Vibe
** Update: okay, I found out I can't take credit for "Fantablulous" since I just found out I share the love of this word with a fellow blogger and sista-friend "Coco_fiere"... thanks for the comment!
Foods: The perfect steak fry, Lawry's Prime Rib (California Cut), Chicken Pastina Soup, Byron's Hot Dogs & a hundred other things I shouldn't have.
Thing: IPod, My bed
Places: They don't exist anymore but in memories.
Song: "Lost Without You" by Robin Thicke (Alan Thicke's kid, yes, THAT Alan Thicke), "If I Were A Bird" by Floetry.
Time: Toss up between 1980, 1989, 1991, 1993-1995, 1997-1998
Position: Self-employed (Hey, u read it like u want & I'll read it like I want)
Movie: Many but definitely anything with Carey Grant & Irene Dunne...whatapair!
TV Shows: "24", "Arrested Development", "The Office", "Greys Anatomy", "Chappelle Show", "What About Brian", "New Adventures of Old Christine", "Dancing With The Stars", "American Idol", "Kevin Hill" (best show ever to be canceled), "Fashion Police", "The Actor's Studio", "Entourage", "Weeds" & Sex In The City - (as if!) .... ya know, when I have time to watch TV & all : )
People: I have em, but they already know who they are.

Listing - gonna give it a try!

Listing...
Have you heard of the art of listing? It's a simple way to "blog" without discussing anything in particular. Just start a list of as many random thoughts as you want.....

Here we go...

1. Beyonce's new CD isn't so bad afterall.
2. I'm reeeeally feelin Robin Thick's track "Lost Without You"
3. I think HE gave me a cold.
4. The weather in Chi-town is pretty funky lately.
5. Maybe that's how I got sick,
6. No, it was definitely him.
7. He was sick all last week.
8. I need to wash my hair.
9. I dread it because I have a lot of hair.
10. It's time consuming but I need to do it.
11. Grey's Anatomy & 24 are my two fave shows.
12. It always surprises me how easy it is to get caught up in a tv show.
13. Today is Day 1 of the detox.
14. That's not a show but it's what I'm doing to remove the toxins in my body.
15. We all have them so 6-7 weeks of healthy eating and CHT is on my menu.
16. CHT stands for Colon Hydrotherapy.
17. Don't knock it till you try it.
18. I'm doing it to cleanse my system, improve my health & increase my lifespan.
19. The added bonus of shedding pounds is a nice thought but not my reason for it.
20. No, honest.
21. I'm done listing.